Saturday, November 12, 2011

SCHLEMIEL and SCHLAMAZAL I

In spite of noble efforts by Laverne and Shirley, these two words are often confused. Here is a good way to keep them straight:

You go into a restaurant and sit down. The waiter comes to your table and spills ice water all over you. The waiter is a schlemiel. You are a schlamazal.

TEST QUESTIONS --- SCHLEMIEL OR SCHLAMAZAL?

1.You talk too much and give away a surprise party. Are you a schlemiel or a schlamazal?

2. You are driving behind a large truck loaded with lemons. The bouncing of the truck causes lemon juice to squirt out all over the front of your car and covers your windshield. Are you a  schlemiel or a schlamazal?

3. You are at a wedding and the bride overhears you say, "I can't believe she's wearing white." Are you a schlemiel or a schlamazal?

4. You are riding on a Ferris wheel at a carnival. The machinery malfunctions and you are stuck in the chair for two hours. Are you a schlemiel or a schlamazal?

5. You ask a woman when her baby is due, and she's not pregnant. Are you a schlemiel or a schlamazal?

6. You are introduced to a new couple and you mistake the man's wife for his mother. Are you a schlemiel or a schlamazal?

7. You step into a bathroom stall and move the latch to the lock position. The little knob you hold to slide the latch breaks off in your hand, leaving a stub which prevents the latch from sliding back to the open position. You are trapped and have to wriggle out like a snake under the door. Are you a schlemiel or a schlamazal?*

Answers:

1.  Schlemiel
2.  Schlamazal
3.  Schlemiel
4.  Schlamazal
5.  Schlemiel
6.  Schlemiel
7. You are both a schlemiel and a schlamazal. 

*Note from JA: Guess how I came up with example 7?




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