THE DEVIL'S DICTIONARY

Ambrose  Bierce 

B and C

 

Backbite - To speak of a man as you find him before he can find you

Belladonna - In Italian, a beautiful lady; In English, a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues

 

Bigot - One who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not entertain

Birth - The first and direst of all disasters

Bore - A person who talks when you wish him to listen

Bride - A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her

Childhood - The period of human life intermediate between the idiocy of infancy and the folly of youth - two removed from the sin of manhood and three from the remorse of age

 

Congratulations - The civility of envy

 

Conservative - A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal, who wishes to replace them with others 

Consolation - The knowledge that a better man is more unfortunate than yourself

 

Contempt -  The feeling of a prudent man for an enemy who is too formidable to be safely opposed

Corporation - An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility