RIDDLES

1. Did you hear about the lazy gastroenterologist?

2. Which weighs more, a pound of feathers or a pound of bricks?

3. Which weighs more, a pound of feathers or a pound of gold?

4. I am the best, it can't be denied,

    Winners and champions are always by my side.

    Who am I?

 

5. What do Babe Ruth and a trash can have in common?

 

6. Unheralded wildebeest installs tesserae in zoo cage. What did the other wildebeests say?

 

7. Why is Goldilocks a bad date at a restaurant? 

 

8. A woman's husband was in the habit of calling her "mother or four" - referring to their four children. The woman hated this, especially when he would call her this way when it was time to leave a social gathering. What did the wife say to her husband that put an immediate stop to this habit? 

 

9. I grew up with Steve Jobs, Johnny Cash, and Bob Hope. Now there are no jobs, no cash, and no hope. Please don't let anything happen to _______  _______.

 

Answers:

 

1. He performed a semi-colonoscopy.  

 

2. They weigh the same. A pound's a pound.

 

3. A pound of feathers weighs more. Gold and other precious metals 

 are weighed according to the troy system - where one pound = 12 ounces. In the standard system of weights (avoirdupois), a pound = 16 ounces.   

 

4. (the number) 1

 

5. They're both icons. 

 

6. "Wow! Typical gnu and tiler too."

 

7. She always sends her food back twice. 

 

8. The next time it was time to leave a party and he said,  "Time to go, mother of four," 

she replied, "Coming, father of three."

 

9. Kevin Bacon

 

Credits:

6: GROUCHO 

    from The Enigma 

    April, 2025 

9: Submitted by Jesse Morris