Ladies and jellybeans,
Reptiles and crocodiles,
I come before you
And stand behind you
To tell you something
I know nothing about.
Next Thursday,
The day after Friday,
There will be a ladies' meeting
For men only.
Don't dress up,
Just wear your best clothes.
If you can't come,
You're welcome.
If you can,
Just stay home.
Admission is free,
Just pay at the door.
There are plenty of seats,
So sit on the floor.

One fine day in the middle of the night,
Two dead men got up to fight.
Back to back, they faced each other,
Drew their swords and shot each other.
One was blind, the other couldn't see,
They called my grandma to referee.
A voiceless man shouts hooray,
A blind man watches to see fair play.
A paralyzed donkey walking by,
Kicked the blind man in the eye.
Knocked him through a nine-inch wall,
Into a dry ditch and drowned them all.
A deaf policeman heard the noise,
And came to arrest those two dead boys.
If you don't believe this story's true,
Ask the blind man---he saw it too.

I