A man was telling his friend about training his dog. To demonstrate, he threw a stick and told the dog to fetch it. Instead the dog sits down on the couch and says: "I don't know what's wrong with me. I ache all over. Everything tastes salty. My kids never call me. The Republicans are ruining the country."
The friend says, "That's amazing. You told your dog to fetch a stick, and he sits down and starts talking to us."
"Well," the man says, "he's not fully trained. He thought I said 'kvetch'."
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