DUH XIII
From Reader's Digest
Contributed by Herm Albright

The Philadelphia Inquirer, in a roundup of the year's events, gave its "Latin Prize" to a local TV newswoman. She reportedly had called the district attorney's office to ask how to get "Absentia," in which she had heard a murder trial was being held. 
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From Reader's Digest
Contributed by Ron Dentinger

   Frank was setting up a sundial in his yard when a neighbor asked, "What's that for?"
   Frank stopped to explain. "The sun hits that small triangular spike and casts a shadow on the face of the sundial. Then, as the sun moves across the sky, the shadow also moves along the calibrated dial, enabling a person to determine the correct time."
   The neighbor shook his head. "What will they think of next?"