JOKES

1. Money doesn't always bring happiness. Someone with ten million dollars is probably no happier than someone with only nine million.

2. I'm routinely left immobile, deprived of sleep, fed a tasteless diet, and have absolutely no privacy. Where am I?

3. Becky goes to the post office to buy 50 stamps for her Hanukkah cards.
"What denomination?" asks the postal clerk.
Becky thinks for a second before replying,
"Give me 6 Orthodox, 12 Conservative, and 32 Reformed."

4. A notoriously stingy woman's husband died. She went to the newspaper to place an announcement on the obituary page.
"How much?" she asked.
"A dollar per word." the clerk answered.
"Say 'McGregor died'," the woman told him.
"There's a five-word minimum," said the clerk.
The woman wasn't happy. She thought for a while and then said, "OK, say 'McGregor died. Volvo for sale.' "

Answer #2:

In a hospital