RIDDLES and JOKES

1. Why did the real estate agent have trouble concentrating?

2. Why did the alien spy get tipsy?

3. Why are there no seagulls in bays?

4. Why weighs practically nothing, yet so few can hold it?

5. Customer to clerk in furniture store: The Louis XIV bed you sent out is not big enough. Could you exchange it for a Louis XVI?

6. A rustic inn changes hands and gets miserly new owners - prompting regulars to seek revenge by planning a _ _ _ _ _ _   _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _.

7. What's the difference between the Roman god Janus and a good poker hand?

8. The tag on an unexpected gift simply read "French mistake." We all pondered a bit until we realized the gift was for Dad - which it was. How did we know? 

Answers:

1. He had a lot on his mind.

2. He infiltrated NAPA instead of NASA.

3. Because then they would be bagels.

4. One's tongue (also - breath)

6. Hostel takeover [Shawn Kennedy]

7. Two faces and two aces [Randolph Ross]

8. "French mistake" = Faux pas (Fo' pa)